and just about any ridiculous, preposterous thing has been said within the past week that has come to mind in a desperate, last-minute effort just to see what would stick, I carry on.
I hope you're not that vulnerable and mislead. I hope you understand the significance of the times that we live in, and are able to properly place this all into perspective.
1) After months of back and forth letters, phone calls, and re-directions (My last letter stated "If you cannot change the number of my license, please simply cancel my license altogether." I had had enough bureaucracy), I was told recently that no one had bothered to do it, but someone felt kind enough to let me know that fact. I'm sure it took about the same amount of effort. One would figure that it was sitting in a mail bin somewhere, not to be perpetually ignored. Even though I cut it up when I was told to, it's back to the drawing board on navigating the bureaucracy on getting this thing cancelled.
2) Contrary to what you may have heard, nothing short of surgical removal of the implant will do. Temporary treatment to render it inert and inactive will have to do until the legal process starts, and then I have persons of notoriety and integrity present to sign-off on the integrity of the actual operative process, stating that no funny business has transpired. That way, a lid is placed on the can of potential, tin-foil conspiracy theories.
I have more to say, but not now.
I am busy with the process.
In the meantime, a refresher:
Manufacturing Consent- Noam Chomsky
He may be a Lefty, and I disagree on a decent amount of his politics, but I learned quite a bit from him.
Wednesday, May 29, 2013
Monday, April 29, 2013
The Hand of God.
Before I get into commentary concerning a few other matters of concern to the country, I wanted to share a personal anecdote from this past summer, when I was unfortunately admitted to the hospital due to a life-threatening medical emergency for two weeks.
I say "unfortunately," but there is some good that came out of this.
I get to share a miraculous intervention in my life with the public at large.
I was taking a relatively decent dose of Lithium at that time, I believe it was June.
I was not drinking enough water and staying as hydrated as I should have been.
Also, it was, you know, just plain old hot.
As a result, for a few days leading up to the ambulance ride, my Lithium levels had begun to spike without me knowing it. I had started to become weak. I was vomiting, and couldn't hold food down. Not even fruit.
In that same time, I had also began to experience psychosis, including visual hallucinations (seeing that I was somewhere else while I was just in my bed, and seeing swirling colors on my ceiling), as well as delusions (thinking something totally different was going on in the apartment and neighborhood that I was in).
When I came out of these states, I would hardly remember what happened, or just chalk it up to a dream (It wasn't). Unfortunately, I was never able to connect all of the above dots to Lithium toxicity and act promptly to address the situation in time.
One day, the levels and dehydration caught up to me.
That afternoon, I was at the apartment with my grandmother.
There was a local power outage, and the box fan in my room was out of commission.
To make matters worse, my room, believe it or not, had no windows in it. It just had a door that opened up to the rest of the apartment, and windows toward the ceiling that opened up to the neighboring kitchen area.
All you need to know right now is that I was sprawled out on my mattress in scorching summer heat.
Meanwhile, on the stoop downstairs, my grandmother, whom I love dearly, was having one of her usual hours-long chats with her lady friends. Anyone who knows her knows that she loves to talk, and will talk ad nauseam with her friends and family for hours on end, be it on the phone, with company on the couch, or, as was the case this time, with friends on the front stoop in the summertime. One might jokingly say that it might take an act of God to get her to give herself a rest, as she just really, really loves to talk.
As stated above, she was on the porch, in the middle of one of her conversations with her friends, while she heard a small, childlike voice calling to her, "Grandma, grandma!"
She asked her friends, "Did y'all hear that?"
The replied, "No, Amanda. We didn't hear anything..."
The conversation continues for another few minutes, and the voice intrudes again.
Again, only my grandmother hearing it.
"Are y'all sure you didn't hear that?
"Yeah, Amanda! We don't know what you're talking about!"
The conversation continued one last time, with the voice intruding once more.
Again, my grandmother being the only one able to hear it.
She says, "Hold on for just one minute. I'm going upstairs."
(There were no other grandparents with grandchildren around within earshot at the tiny, quiet end of the block.)
Lo and behold, my grandmother finds me unconscious, unresponsive, sprawled out on my bed in the heat, heartbeat and and breathing totally out of control. My shirt was soaked in sweat, and my eyes bulging like a cartoon character.
The paramedics arrived, stabilized me, and quickly had me admitted to the hospital.
As the Lithium levels dropped in my system, I continued to experience hallucinations for a few days, until I was Lithium-free.
I had a few complications from the incident, such as my own body attacking my right calf (which rehabbed without help a week to two later), and another complication too messed up to mention here.
All things considered, I believe the following points to be fact:
1) My grandmother heard and listened to the voice of the Lord.
2) If not, she would have stayed outside for an indefinite period of time, enjoying the late afternoon/evening swapping stories with her friends on the stoop.
3) Point blank: Had she not listened, judging by the condition that they found me in, I wasn't going to last much longer, and I would be dead right now.
I thank God each and every day.
I say "unfortunately," but there is some good that came out of this.
I get to share a miraculous intervention in my life with the public at large.
I was taking a relatively decent dose of Lithium at that time, I believe it was June.
I was not drinking enough water and staying as hydrated as I should have been.
Also, it was, you know, just plain old hot.
As a result, for a few days leading up to the ambulance ride, my Lithium levels had begun to spike without me knowing it. I had started to become weak. I was vomiting, and couldn't hold food down. Not even fruit.
In that same time, I had also began to experience psychosis, including visual hallucinations (seeing that I was somewhere else while I was just in my bed, and seeing swirling colors on my ceiling), as well as delusions (thinking something totally different was going on in the apartment and neighborhood that I was in).
When I came out of these states, I would hardly remember what happened, or just chalk it up to a dream (It wasn't). Unfortunately, I was never able to connect all of the above dots to Lithium toxicity and act promptly to address the situation in time.
One day, the levels and dehydration caught up to me.
That afternoon, I was at the apartment with my grandmother.
There was a local power outage, and the box fan in my room was out of commission.
To make matters worse, my room, believe it or not, had no windows in it. It just had a door that opened up to the rest of the apartment, and windows toward the ceiling that opened up to the neighboring kitchen area.
All you need to know right now is that I was sprawled out on my mattress in scorching summer heat.
Meanwhile, on the stoop downstairs, my grandmother, whom I love dearly, was having one of her usual hours-long chats with her lady friends. Anyone who knows her knows that she loves to talk, and will talk ad nauseam with her friends and family for hours on end, be it on the phone, with company on the couch, or, as was the case this time, with friends on the front stoop in the summertime. One might jokingly say that it might take an act of God to get her to give herself a rest, as she just really, really loves to talk.
As stated above, she was on the porch, in the middle of one of her conversations with her friends, while she heard a small, childlike voice calling to her, "Grandma, grandma!"
She asked her friends, "Did y'all hear that?"
The replied, "No, Amanda. We didn't hear anything..."
The conversation continues for another few minutes, and the voice intrudes again.
Again, only my grandmother hearing it.
"Are y'all sure you didn't hear that?
"Yeah, Amanda! We don't know what you're talking about!"
The conversation continued one last time, with the voice intruding once more.
Again, my grandmother being the only one able to hear it.
She says, "Hold on for just one minute. I'm going upstairs."
(There were no other grandparents with grandchildren around within earshot at the tiny, quiet end of the block.)
Lo and behold, my grandmother finds me unconscious, unresponsive, sprawled out on my bed in the heat, heartbeat and and breathing totally out of control. My shirt was soaked in sweat, and my eyes bulging like a cartoon character.
The paramedics arrived, stabilized me, and quickly had me admitted to the hospital.
As the Lithium levels dropped in my system, I continued to experience hallucinations for a few days, until I was Lithium-free.
I had a few complications from the incident, such as my own body attacking my right calf (which rehabbed without help a week to two later), and another complication too messed up to mention here.
All things considered, I believe the following points to be fact:
1) My grandmother heard and listened to the voice of the Lord.
2) If not, she would have stayed outside for an indefinite period of time, enjoying the late afternoon/evening swapping stories with her friends on the stoop.
3) Point blank: Had she not listened, judging by the condition that they found me in, I wasn't going to last much longer, and I would be dead right now.
I thank God each and every day.
Sunday, April 21, 2013
"Cultivating Gratitude and Joy"
Been reading from a book called The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are.
An excerpt was fitting.
Scarcity And Fear Of The Dark
The very first time I tried to write about what gets in the way of gratitude and joy, I was sitting on the couch in my living room with my laptop next to me and my research memo journal in my hands. I was tired and rather than writing, I spent an hour staring at the twinkle lights hanging over the entryway into my dining room. I'm a huge fan of those little clear, sparkly lights. I think they make the world look prettier, so I keep them in my house year-round.
As I sat there flipping through the stories and gazing at the twinkle lights, I took out a pen and wrote this down:
Twinkle lights are the perfect metaphor for joy. Joy is not a constant. It comes to us in moments- often ordinary moments. Sometimes we miss out on the bursts of joy because we're too busy chasing down extraordinary moments. Other times we're so afraid of the dark that we don't dare let ourselves enjoy the light.
A joyful life is not a floodlight of joy. That would eventually become unbearable.
I believe a joyful life is made up of joyful moments gracefully strung together by trust, gratitude, inspiration, and faith.
For those of you who follow my blog, you'll recognize this as the mantra for my gratitude posts on Fridays that I call TGIF. I turned this quote into a small badge, and and part of my gratitude practice is a weekly post about what I'm Trusting, what I'm Grateful for, what Inspires me, and how I'm practicing my Faith. It's incredibly powerful to read everyone's comments.
Joy and gratitude can be very vulnerable and intense experiences. We are an anxious people and many of us have very little tolerance for vulnerability. Our anxiety and fear can manifest as scarcity. We think to ourselves:
-I'm not going to allow myself to feel this joy because I know it won't last.
-Acknowledging how grateful I am is an invitation for disaster.
-I'd rather not be joyful than have to wait for the other shoe to drop.
Fear of the Dark
I've always been prone to worry and anxiety, but after I became a mother, negotiating joy, gratitude, and scarcity felt like a full-time job. For years, my fear of something terrible happening to my children actually prevented me from fully embracing joy and gratitude. Every time I came too close to softening into sheer joyfulness about my children and how much I love them, I'd picture losing everything in a flash.
At first I thought I was crazy. Was I the only person in the world who did this? As my therapist and I started working on it, I realized that my "too good to be true" was totally related to fear, scarcity, and vulnerability.
Knowing that those are pretty universal emotions, I gathered up the courage to talk about my experiences with a group of five hundred parents who had come to one of my parenting lectures. I gave an example of standing over my daughter watching her sleep, feeling totally engulfed in gratitude, then being ripped out of that joy and gratitude by images of something bad happening to her.
You could have heard a pin drop. I thought, Oh, God. I'm crazy and now they're all sitting there like, "She's a nut. How do we get out of here?" Then all of a sudden I heard the sound of a woman toward the back starting to cry. Not sniffle cry, but sob cry. That sound was followed by someone from the front shouting out, "Oh my God! Why do we do that? What does it mean?" The auditorium erupted in some kind of crazy parent revival. As I had suspected, I was not alone.
Most of us have experienced being on the edge of joy only to be overcome by vulnerability and thrown into fear. Until we can tolerate vulnerability and transform it into gratitude, intense feelings of of love will often bring up the fear of loss. If I had to sum up what I've learned about fear and joy, this is what I would say:
The dark does not destroy the light; it defines it. It's our fear of the dark that casts our joy into the shadows.
This one's for my battle buddies out there.
An excerpt was fitting.
Scarcity And Fear Of The Dark
The very first time I tried to write about what gets in the way of gratitude and joy, I was sitting on the couch in my living room with my laptop next to me and my research memo journal in my hands. I was tired and rather than writing, I spent an hour staring at the twinkle lights hanging over the entryway into my dining room. I'm a huge fan of those little clear, sparkly lights. I think they make the world look prettier, so I keep them in my house year-round.
As I sat there flipping through the stories and gazing at the twinkle lights, I took out a pen and wrote this down:
Twinkle lights are the perfect metaphor for joy. Joy is not a constant. It comes to us in moments- often ordinary moments. Sometimes we miss out on the bursts of joy because we're too busy chasing down extraordinary moments. Other times we're so afraid of the dark that we don't dare let ourselves enjoy the light.
A joyful life is not a floodlight of joy. That would eventually become unbearable.
I believe a joyful life is made up of joyful moments gracefully strung together by trust, gratitude, inspiration, and faith.
For those of you who follow my blog, you'll recognize this as the mantra for my gratitude posts on Fridays that I call TGIF. I turned this quote into a small badge, and and part of my gratitude practice is a weekly post about what I'm Trusting, what I'm Grateful for, what Inspires me, and how I'm practicing my Faith. It's incredibly powerful to read everyone's comments.
Joy and gratitude can be very vulnerable and intense experiences. We are an anxious people and many of us have very little tolerance for vulnerability. Our anxiety and fear can manifest as scarcity. We think to ourselves:
-I'm not going to allow myself to feel this joy because I know it won't last.
-Acknowledging how grateful I am is an invitation for disaster.
-I'd rather not be joyful than have to wait for the other shoe to drop.
Fear of the Dark
I've always been prone to worry and anxiety, but after I became a mother, negotiating joy, gratitude, and scarcity felt like a full-time job. For years, my fear of something terrible happening to my children actually prevented me from fully embracing joy and gratitude. Every time I came too close to softening into sheer joyfulness about my children and how much I love them, I'd picture losing everything in a flash.
At first I thought I was crazy. Was I the only person in the world who did this? As my therapist and I started working on it, I realized that my "too good to be true" was totally related to fear, scarcity, and vulnerability.
Knowing that those are pretty universal emotions, I gathered up the courage to talk about my experiences with a group of five hundred parents who had come to one of my parenting lectures. I gave an example of standing over my daughter watching her sleep, feeling totally engulfed in gratitude, then being ripped out of that joy and gratitude by images of something bad happening to her.
You could have heard a pin drop. I thought, Oh, God. I'm crazy and now they're all sitting there like, "She's a nut. How do we get out of here?" Then all of a sudden I heard the sound of a woman toward the back starting to cry. Not sniffle cry, but sob cry. That sound was followed by someone from the front shouting out, "Oh my God! Why do we do that? What does it mean?" The auditorium erupted in some kind of crazy parent revival. As I had suspected, I was not alone.
Most of us have experienced being on the edge of joy only to be overcome by vulnerability and thrown into fear. Until we can tolerate vulnerability and transform it into gratitude, intense feelings of of love will often bring up the fear of loss. If I had to sum up what I've learned about fear and joy, this is what I would say:
The dark does not destroy the light; it defines it. It's our fear of the dark that casts our joy into the shadows.
This one's for my battle buddies out there.
Saturday, March 30, 2013
"Shame"
"A painful emotion caused by a strong sense of guilt, embarrassment, unworthiness, or disgrace."
I wanted to talk for a few minutes and revisit something you may have heard a million times, but probably missed something from, and that would be the crucifixion of Jesus Christ.
I'll start with a passage from Matthew 27:32-54.
A few things stuck out concerning the crucifixion of my Lord and savior Jesus Christ.
1) He turns down a yet-unknown beverage, which turns out to be some type of numbing wine mixture. (No oxycodone. Tough it out!)
2) Soldiers profiteering over the event and casting lots over his garments.
3) Public mockery and brutality.
I get the feeling that people usually get the idea that Christ came to Earth to die for our sins and reconcile us with our heavenly Father. That's fairly well understood. Maybe to a fault.
Everyone understands that nails and sharp thrusts in your side are not most peoples' idea of a good hearty tickle. Yes, we know it sucked, physically.
But what about psychologically?
2 Corinthians 5:21
He who knew no sin "became" sin.
Not "interviewed sinners."
Not "peeped their webpage."
Let that sink in for a moment.
What does that entail?
Let's peel back the onion.
He became sin.
Something so alien, so foreign to God, who is perfect.
Let's bring back that definition of "shame."
"A painful emotion caused by a strong sense of guilt, embarrassment, unworthiness, or disgrace."
So, to get this one right, someone who has never done a single thing wrong in his life had the world's sins heaped upon him, and then abandoned by his Father in his most trying of times because he reeked so badly.
He knows what it feels like to be a thief, although he has never stolen a single, solitary thing.
He knows the guilt of a con-man, even though he would be the most straight-up businessman you've ever met. That drunk driver who killed your cousin? He's been there, felt that.
It makes me wonder what was worse or what he dreaded more: the physical pain or the psychological anguish?
I figured this would be a good time to discuss the covenant that the Lord has made me a high priest of. This has nothing to do with repentance for sins, atonement, nor salvation. It is a gift from our Father for the house of Jacob, because we are chosen and special to him (Even still as he works, molds, and shapes us with love).
It is about life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
The Son has set us free.
Hebrews 12:1-17
Hebrews 8
I thank the Lord daily for his salvation, direction, sacrifice, hope, and companionship.
Without it, I would be lost.
Hope you have a happy Easter (Resurrection Day, what have you).
God Bless you and yours.
Thursday, March 21, 2013
3/21/13
Brotherhood.
Love.
Fellowship.
Safety.
Supernatural provision in the midst of the storm.
The perks of being an American citizen and God's chosen.
When this time comes, it will be a dream come true.
Thursday, March 14, 2013
"Rapture & Resurrection"
I figured now was as good a time as any to tackle as controversial a topic as the "Rapture."
It has been a topic that has stirred up much emotion and debate in some circles, so I figured I'd give it the good old college try myself.
Everyone else has.
Possibly I can offer some new insight on the topic that you have never heard before.
Maybe even change your mind on the subject.
Maybe I cannot.
What I can guarantee you is that I will spur some discussions concerning the matter and its scriptural basis, and that is what's most important.
Unfortunately, to me, it just seems that a Pre-Tribulation rapture is dogmatic in many churches without adequate basis besides tradition and repetition (The same applies with "One World Government." This phrase or idea is mentioned nowhere in the Bible. It is only wrought by the contortion or misinterpretation of scripture, nor will it ever come to pass).
Let me first state that I believe in a "Pre-Wrath" rapture. That "wrath" being "The Day of the Lord," or the prophetic one-year time frame (according to the biblical "Day-for-a-Year" principal) of the 7 bowl judgments commencing after the rapture, and finishing with the Battle of Armageddon and the establishment of Christ's Earthly kingdom.
That being said, after some meticulous research and study, it seems to me that the church will indeed be present when the peace treaty is signed between Israel and her neighbors, the three and a half years of peace following, and lastly the 2 and half years of the Great Tribulation (or wrath of the Beast, or Satan) following the Abomination of Desolation (Mark 13:14-37, Daniel, elsewhere).
I want to continue with a pertinent passage, loaded with some important factual nuggets. That's 2 Thessalonians 2.
(What is this "truth" that they refused to "love" and "believe?")
Concerning the rapture (& resurrection), the passage makes it clear to believers that they would not be gathered unto Christ until certain things first took place in the future:
1) A major "rebellion," or "falling away" within the church itself.
2) The removal of "he who now restrains" (or "he who now letteth," KJV) from the picture.
3) The Abomination of Desolation takes place at the temple (thus revealing the identity of the Antichrist).
I have seen some try to rationalize that the individual in point number two is the church of God, paving the way for the launching of World War III while the church sits up in Heaven watching as the whole ordeal goes down.
The issue I have with this is that the church is traditionally referred to as a "she," not a "he."
Who could this be referring to in the masculine?
A friend of the bridegroom, not the church body as a whole.
That's the bad news.
It looks to me that the church is faced with dealing with the wrath of the Beast.
Good news?
He will not control the entire world, as I have repeatedly said.
I would like to delve further into the sequential order of events that I have talked about to back myself up a bit, and read from Revelation 14: 14-20. The first angel represents the 7th and last trumpet, rapturing the believers just before the Day of the Lord's wrath. The second angel representing God's judgment of the nations following just after the rapture of his believers, imagery replete with waves of flowing blood to drive the point home: the year of bowl judgments will not be fun for anyone left behind and not sealed. Point blank.
Because Revelation can be a bit to digest and sort through, 1 Corinthians 15:50-58 also makes it clear that the living believers will be raptured at the 7th trump, right before the Day of the Lord bowl judgments.
So, since it seems Christ never promised the church at large zero hardship or suffering, it's clear it is in the believer's best interest to plan and act as if they still need to be around to take care of themselves, their families, and their country until they get a call from upstairs telling them otherwise: that they can finally leave all of their troubles behind for good.
That's not going to be for a while.
Until then, the mortgage still needs to be paid, your credit score still matters, and the Chicago Cubs are still unlikely to win a World Series.
See: The Bible Codes
Tuesday, March 5, 2013
A Few Simple Truths.
1) The effects of cumulative, baseless harassment and the rigors of life over time can cause trauma and warp the mind.
It does not mean that the essence of the person within has changed.
2) It can cause Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, especially with the reverberating, paranoia and anxiety-inducing effects of cybernetic implants.
Ever hear someone call into a radio show and neglect to turn down their radio in the background?
It is a similar concept.
Throw marijuana into the mix with a battered brain, and you are just asking for a projectile vomiting session.
Why?
There is reason for concern when people assume God-like attributes and abilities without the perfect, trustworthy character and motives of God himself.
With God, both your pain and prayers are private, and there is no reason to be anxious at all.
He will not sell your information to a third party, and there is no reason to ever think worst case scenario.
The brain is fine as is.
You were not meant to be naked or tweaked with.
"Thank you for calling the Dr. Lipschitz baby talk hotline..."
Mark 7:14-23
It does not mean that the essence of the person within has changed.
2) It can cause Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, especially with the reverberating, paranoia and anxiety-inducing effects of cybernetic implants.
Ever hear someone call into a radio show and neglect to turn down their radio in the background?
It is a similar concept.
Throw marijuana into the mix with a battered brain, and you are just asking for a projectile vomiting session.
Why?
There is reason for concern when people assume God-like attributes and abilities without the perfect, trustworthy character and motives of God himself.
With God, both your pain and prayers are private, and there is no reason to be anxious at all.
He will not sell your information to a third party, and there is no reason to ever think worst case scenario.
The brain is fine as is.
You were not meant to be naked or tweaked with.
"Thank you for calling the Dr. Lipschitz baby talk hotline..."
Mark 7:14-23
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